Again, thanks to everyone who has read my posts here...

I'll miss this playground.  =)

My new home can be found here. 

Something bothers me.  A lot.

Why does it have to be like this, I feel like it's getting worse everytime that there's an issue that needs to be resolved?

Again, I perfectly understand the reason why you have to be away from me again.  And that never became an issue.  The problem is, I am so used to having you in my life and it's always difficult for me to face another set of days where I'd have to wake up and not see your face.

What hurts me more is that you said you'd do things to bridge the distance between us, let you decide on how you'd do so, but what happened?  The same reason why I have been acting so cold towards you...cuz I don't want myself to expect, don't want myself to assume...too bad, you set my expectations that we both know, shouldn't be expected at all.

I don't want to cry, not yet, cuz I have been doing that since the day you left.

Looking back at those days when we were just starting, I kept asking myself if I really have been true to myself.  And the answer's yes.

11:27 PM 3/26/2009

Ang hirap noh.  Pag wala ka.
Parang nang-aamot ako ng atensyon sa ibang tao, wag lang mapansing mag-isa ako.  Pati ang mag-bf, kailangan kong abalahin, para lang may makasama.
Para akong tanga.

Ganito pa rin kaya ang magiging sitwasyon, 3 months from now?  6 months from now?  A year from now?

In fairness, mabilis namang dumaan tong shift na to.  Partida, wala akong ginawa kundi magsetup ng magsetup ng mga photos sa lilipatan kong blog.

Lahat na lang ng makasalubong ko, iisa ang sinasabi. 
"Bakit ka nakasimangot?"

Pano naman ako tatawa, eh wala yung dahilan para tumawa ako?
Pero pag nandito ka na...oo nga, tatawa ako ulit...pero hanggang kelan na naman?  Hanggang sa makalimutan ko ulit kung papano ang pakiramdam ng mag-isa, para lang marealize ulit na mawawala ka na naman isang araw?

Sana ito na yung huling beses na magsusulat ako ng tungkol sa ganito.  Ng tungkol sa bitterness, hinanakit...sama ng loob.

For those who have dropped by this site and have read all my blog entries, thank you sooo much.  Unfortunately, I have to put more stuff on to my blog that blogdrive wont be able to accommodate. 

I'm moving, soon! 

I'm currently in the process of archiving stuff.  Will keep this blog updated as to where my new home will be.

Ciao!

Nope.  Not permanently.
This will be until I realized and I have forced myself to accept who I really am, until I have stopped yearning for that someday, until I have learned that there isn't anything for me.

Until my brain has processed these, I won't be blogging for God knows how long.

It just suddenly dawned to me that I shouldn't be posting something that's half-happiness, half-expectations.  Or let's say, half-something that leads to disappointment.

Bye for now.  Green Kitten signing off.